Because, let's face it: You want to know.
This is a ninja:
You've probably heard of them by now. If you haven't watch some movies or something. But not movies based on novels by Jane Austen, because very few of those contain ninjas.
Also, say "Ninja" like 35 times in a row. It'll sound really weird to you after that.
Alright, now, for the cake:
1. If your friend wears a black ninja suit all the time, he/she is not a ninja. Technically, a girl can't be a ninja. I know that's unusually sexist of me, but listen, a girl-ninja is called a
konoichi. Get your terminology right, you cretins. Calling a girl a ninja is like calling a girl-cop a "policeman". But let's get back to my so-called "point". You can't
see a ninja. If you see someone dressed as a ninja, then they're only pretending to be a ninja, unless it's a clever ninja using reverse-psychology, but in that case, you're probably going to be dead in five seconds anyhow.
2. Try to plunge a fork into your friend's head. If they stop you with their cat-like reflexes and kill you, then you'll know they're a ninja. If they don't, and you stab them, then you'll know they were, in fact, not a ninja.
3. Do they sleep with their eyes open? If so, they're ninjas.
4. Take a bag of corn chips and...
wait.
I can't do this. This is just too damn stupid.
I feel like this post doesn't really do anything. It's not really
that funny, and it's not making anyone's lives better. I feel like I should be making peoples lives better or some shit.
Comments (108)
Hmm...I might take a stab at this list someday. If you don't mind anyway.
i was waiting to see what i should do with a bag of corn chips D:
I have a friend who is convinced she's a ninja. It's somewhat disturbing.
LOL at how you just stopped in the middle of the entry..or are you? ;)
That's where you're wrong. This WAS funny. Good work...
somehow it didn't make any sense
but when i think about it .. yeah .. people who dress up like ninja's aren't real
damn those wanna-bees
what about nantaruno? that's what the neighbors are saying!
That is one kawaii ninja.
stopping this post was a good start....
I've always thought the same thing, too!! Only posers wear the outfit. A real one could be your mom or dad who'll kill you without even batting an eyelash. They could also be those stone lamps sold at japanese nursuries- I don't know if I spelled that right. It looks weird to me.
Damn you and your ninja mind-clouding powers... I might write a post on ninjas one day to clear away the ninja smoke, from their smoke bombs.
I think it is funny.
"If you see someone dressed as a ninja, then they're only pretending to
be a ninja, unless it's a clever ninja using reverse-psychology, but in
that case, you're probably going to be dead in five seconds anyhow."
:]
I gave my boyfriend one of those ninja plushes for his birthday. It's always randomly disappearing in his truck and popping up in the weirdest places... and staring...
entries from others
Thanks for the PSA. I'll sleep more soundly tonight knowing I'm surrounded by invisible ninjas.
Ha ha ha he he he lol
You ended the joke before making a reference to Pirates. Fail post is fail.
I couldn't help myself. I had to rec this.
You could make a contest where everyone dresses as a ninja to raise breast cancer awareness, I don't know what either of them have to do with each other, but it's the going trend anyway.
Don't leave me hanging on corn chips now!
I just had a bag of them. LOL
Personally... I'm just sick of hearing about ninjas.
The Onion's video of the ninja parade just can't be beat. It's time to move on.
Meh. I liked this post any way. :)
@DrugInducedDuck - Actually, I was thinking about killing baby to raise SIDS awareness. It just makes sense.
@AvenueToTheReal - you know, I completely agree.
You know, that dinosaur I had sex with last night was a total ninja after he had his pleasure. If ya know what I mean.