June 9, 2008

• The Reason

  You know what pisses me off? Music. As much as it was meant to be enjoyed, it also is a constant source of ultra-pissiness on my part. My friends often discuss music, mostly to share with me bands that I don't want to listen to in the first place and end up hating when I finally give in and listen to them just to stop my so-called 'friends' from begging  me to check out the said bands/artists.

  In our discussions, we often stumble across the unfortunate topic of mainstream music and can never really agree if it truly sucks or not. My homeslice, Lithium98, recently brought up this topic on his blog, asking why we suddenly hate bands if they become mainstream.
  
  THEREFORE, I GIVE THEE THE REASON.

  Alright, so imagine you have a band that you really, really love. Let's call this band 'Evil Babies'. So, back in 1995, you discovered Evil Babies after listening to the radio at 4 a.m. in the morning. Your immediate reaction was "Wow! I need to buy the cassette tape!" so you ran to the music store the following day were orgasmically delighted to see that they had an Evil Babies tape on the shelf. You listened to the tape and it was the best.

  Later, you found yourself at an Evil Babies concert. The show rocked. You loved every moment of it. The best part was, you were among fellow Evil Babies fans. While at school, nobody had even heard of such a band. In fact, nobody even wanted to hear about Evil Babies. Every time you brought it up, they said "Quit talking about that band. Nobody cares." Nevertheless, you remained an avid Evil Babies fan. Soon, an Evil Babies poster found itself up on your wall, then, several more.

  Then, something incredible happened. You somehow acquired a backstage pass to an Evil Babies concert and got to meet the band. It was a surreal moment. You got to shake hands with Davie Joel Aldrin, the lead singer whom you had admired for his incredible lyrics, artistic talent and raw sexuality for years. "I love your music!" you blurt out and add "Keeping making great stuff!" They smile and assure you that Evil Babies will continue to keep making awesome music for the fans.

  Years later...

  You're in highschool and aren't really popular. You've begun to be accustomed to your general isolation from others and your inability to relate with them. You resent them for snubbing you for so long. Friends you had in middle school have changed. They don't hang out with you anymore, because they're too busy hanging out with people you can't stand. They act super-douchey. Still, you have everything you love, like your hobby of Parkour, and your music. Evil Babies is still on all your playlists and you love them.

  Then, something amazing happens. Evil Babies releases a new album. As you listen to it, you realize that it's a bit different than all the older albums. Perhaps they're just maturing in their sound, you think. You begin hearing their new album on the radio and the songs get played so many times that they begin to annoy you. Plus, even worse, all the people you despise are suddenly wearing Evil Babies t-shirts and singing the new Evil Babies songs in the hallways.

  You feel like the band stopped caring about you, the fan. It said it loved you and was going to keep making music for you. But no, it started making music for uncultured cretins! Now, you find yourself hating Evil Babies. By golly, if they don't care about you, then you don't care about them. The new album sucks, and you know it because you've heard their old stuff, but as far as everyone else is concerned, it's 'the first album' by Evil Babies and it rocks. Finally, there is nothing more fucking annoying than watching in dismay as some giggly, bubbly, preppy girl lip-synchs an Evil Babies song while doing the Chicken Dance.

  And THAT is why

  It's like the band cheated on me. I tore all my Evil Babies posters down.

  

  • 3:40 pm
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