June 24, 2010
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JAPAN!!!!
Reposted from 2007, because this is one of my self-favorites of all-time! Enjoy!
Sayanora! Greeting from Japan!
Japan is sexy country with many wonderful qualities!
In Japan, we don't eat with fork! Fork cost five hundred dollar!!! That is wonderfully crazy price for eating utensil! We eat with chopstick and are home to world's greatest eater Takeru Kobayashi who is better eater than Joey Chestnut who has no honor.
FORK ARE STUPID AND BAD FOR EATING TSUNAKE!!!
This is island of Japan. Japan is country rich with tradition and cultures! In Japan, you no wear shoes in house or we cut your genitals off with ginzu knife. In Japan, to showing respect, you bow. The lower you bow, the more respect you show. If you bow so low that you split forehead on ground, you show a ton of honor!!!! ^_^_^
North Korea not sexy -_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
Japan is full of sex ^_^_^
Wonderful and strange sex o_O_o
Japan make more porn than America! O_o_O
^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^_^
J-Rock and J-Pop music is better than any other music in the world our artists are sexy and make wonderful and super music that is good for the listening.
ADE CHAI!!! Sushi-go-round is most wonderful and mystical wonder of the world. Our Sumos are unstoppable. A Japan Sumo can stop an M-1 tank with his belly!!!!! O_O
GODZILLA!!!!!!!!!!! -_-_-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
Comments (66)
Notes:
I was originally going to make the Squidking's caption read "Come to
Japan or I will rape you", but I thought that could misconstrued as
potentially threatening, so I changed it.
lol you've managed to capture the essence of what Japan is in just a few paragraphs!
Japan is also the home of kanji, which has inspired hundreds of people who don't understand these characters to get tattoos which are supposed to say things such as "Faithful Friend" or "Free Spirit" on places such as their lower backs or rib cage. Sometimes these people are jipped, and these tattoos actually say things like "old hag" or "leg spreader." o_O
What.... the.... fuck, lol.
youforgotpocky.
Woah. Wow.
Well, you deserve a cookie. And Japan is pretty sexy. I love using chopsticks, even if I'm filipino (We use spoons and forks when we eat...it's very awkward when you're at a restaraunt, and everyone there eats the american way... :'[)
-throws a cookie at...YOU!-
:]
HA! I loved it! I have never been to Japan, but reading your article makes me wonder how much I am really missing
lol. well, you know, i think original caption would have been best
ryc: I like that. Simple, elegant, easy to understand. You win.
ryc: REALLY? My sisters are in love with those two blondies.
I'd go to Japan if it wasn't so expensive, and if Godzilla and that squid were on vacation. I've been to China though, and it was awesome. But it seems to me that Chinese culture is very different than Japanese culture.
re: puke
So nice to know I'm not alone, hahaha.
I would be offended if I was japansese. But im not.
I don't remember that Godzilla-shaped island near Japan...
you know...that squid leads to tentacle rape sex....stupid hentai!
"Japan is sexy"... lol
Never been to Japan... I plan to travel though so maybe one day... and Japan makes more porn than America? O.o
And I should learn some wicked breakdance moves? Why exactly?
---embrace?
I think I'm turning Japanese
I think I'm turning Japanese
I really think so!
Konichiwa!
mwah ha ha ha this is funny!
I would love to visit Japan someday.
Silly question, I'm sure, but do they require you to know quite a bit of Japanese or is it alright to be a dumb American there?
What an awesome post! X3
another entertaining entry......I was having sushi the other day for dinner, I especially love it with a shot of hot sake. YUM!
lol...umm?
ryc: she said she felt it was plagarized cuz it seemed like it was written by 2 diff ppl. so parts were strong and others weren't.
i think im gonna have some sushi this weekend....i was resisting...not after seeing that pic. thanks a lot buddy!
I have an insatiable desire to travel to Japan to shop. Mostly for platform shoes, awesome clothes, and J-pop CDs. Darn you, The Killers, and your music video based in Japan...
squid is mighty tasty... cooked or raw!!!
Oh, my, word.
RYC: Thanks for the comment. I'll be sure to take the advice to heart
Okay, first you imply that cats are somehow superior to poodles, which is a mortal sin in the form of heresy.
THEN you imply that somehow J-Pop is superior to the immortal guitar playing of Django Reinhardt who was touring playing gypsy jazz long before Bob Moog invented the technology that made the American 1980's Pop(and thus J-Pop) possible!
I admit Japan had minute importance in the evolution of endlessly amusing and insane wastes of time such as Otakon. But you should amend the mention of music in this post....
-Alexander the Zounderkite
Yes please.
Their porn is so much better than ours. Only the Japanese could make being stuck in private bits by tentacles sexy...
Their horror movies are better, too. They have a horror movie where people are killed by a spiral. I mean, it's not even an inanimate object; it's a fucking symbol. They're crazy.
ryc: fireworks and gymnastics it is. but naked, 'cause that makes both those things ever so much more interesting...
Wow! I loves your post...now I'm really interested in going to Japan!!! Seriously, I love to travel and I was going to plan a trip to China but I do believe that Japan is calling my naaaammmmee!!!
RYC: Do you really think that!!! My sister thinks the exact thing! How sad for him cuz he's not getting any! lol, I try to give people the benefit of the doubt...but I don't know!! Thanks for your input though!!
<3 De
You're quite the interesting writer.
Didn't Kobayashi lose to a bear in an eating contest?
Crazy. I heard he lost to a bear. I wonder how much he poops on a daily basis or annual expenditure on toilet paper. PS
I posted a new entry. I didn't think anyone kept up with my xanga, how did you come across mine anyhow? Anywho thanks for stopping by.
Uh...well, if they'd married on teh internet, they'd actually have to kiss...THROUGH THE INTERNET! Which would be weird. Then, if he sent sperm through the interent, then well...it wouldn't exactly be THEIR kid biologically. Just...well, they could go and net a neopet or something.
I dunno really.
It's the way life is? (Random.)
comment
Who is this Bob you quote?
Is it Bob Dobbs? Keep it mind although he brings the message of slack he is only a Subgenius. He is quite stupid, just very lucky, which is more important to one of the Subgenius. http://www.subgenius.com/
Furthermore Cats may be the greatest of "Beasts" but Poodles are in a category above beasts. It goes in descending order Poodles, Humans, Beasts.
I still doubt you have ever taken the time to get to know a Poodle you breedist.
I would love to go to Japan. Especally after reading your entry, who would dare missing out on this?
Oh, I missed an "i" from especially.
what?? no engrish?1?
You are hilarious. Wanna hear something funny? Well, I'll tell you anyway... ha ha. I love thai food, but I like to eat it with chopsticks. That is not very pc because they don't use chopsticks, so I am afraid if I assk for them they will be laughing in their head and thinking "dumb white girl, ha ha" anyway, probally not, so I need to get my own set so I can sneak off and eat it on my own!!
Drinking soup with chopsticks doesn't exactly work. Unless it's chunky.
The spork is the ultimate utensil.
haha-thanks for the comment. i do have a WAR shirt idea that's been on launchpad for a while.
gotta sell the shirts on the site to make room;) they're all on sale for $11 til mon. if you want to check it out.
I tend to answer the featured questions however I want, using the feature as a means to popularize my blog.
this is a very entertaining post...
Hilarious. The squid cartoon had me rolling
What...the...hell. Don't worry, I loved it ^_^. Also your new avatar is AWESOME!!
I've only been to Narita, but I posolutely LOVED it.
u forgot about anime! =D
Sushi make Japan even MORE sexy. Rawrrrr
I post from the future, seeing that all the comments say 2007.
IT'S GODZILLA!!!!!!!!!!!
LMAO I LOVE YOU! haahahahahahahahhhahaha
Hilarious.
You make me laugh with all your posts.
Well bend me over, spank my ass and hand-wash my privates... you mean you were this awesome in 2007 too? *swoon*
HENTAIIIII!
@DJ_GiNSU - Nori was awesome from the start. go back to the beginning and read some of her old stuff.
Haha this is awesome! XD
meh
haaaaaaahahahahaha
Onegaishimasu - Spent a week in Tokyo and I don't speak Nihongo. Most signs are in English as well as Kanji. I spent two days just wandering around the back street of Shinjuku and Jimbocho alone. Great stuff. Every time I looked confused someone would rush up to practice their 'Engrish' on me. Left my bag on a cafe table at one point and went back an hour later … it was still there. It was like being on a different planet!
I really want to go to japan now, all of that sex talk :-p
Sex and Sushi, doesn't get much better than that, lmao
Arigato!! We totally copy off Japan. Matter of fact, I need to go to the local Japanese Outlet and snag me some, "Hello Kitty" stationary.
I love Japan and jpop!
i want to go to Japan one day. the food looks so good there!
Taiwan says hi.
Hahaha! I love this. I am currently crossing my fingers that I might be sent there in a handbasket by the end of September this year. This just reminded my why I tried SO HARD to apply for the representation. =)
chopstixxx 4 the wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!!!
@AvenueToTheReal - Tentacles. Rape. The two usually goes hand in hand.
i lol'd at "ow! something in my eye!"
Lately, I've been missing those big group chats we used to have. I thought I'd see whether you're still around, and I'm delighted to find posts as funny as ever.
Comments are closed.